Warning: Now that I’ve finished reading the books, this may contain spoilers…
I just saw a Facebook status that made me do one of these:
A girl who I am friends with posted that she “wouldn’t mind being with a Christian Grey right now.”
So, you would prefer to be with a man who is over-the-top rich but beats you for his own personal pleasure?
What the hell?
Maybe it’s the feminist part of me, but the fact that so many women who read these books are now pining for a man like Christian (similarly to how girls pined for Edward in the Twilight saga) is almost scary.
Yes, I can absolutely see the appeal of Christian. He’s beyond gorgeous, incredibly rich (he buys Ana a brand new Saab when the first car he bought her, an Audi I believe, is trashed), and loves to take good care of Ana. These are all great things, if you’re into that. (I am not – my boyfriend, while gorgeous, is nowhere near rich, but he takes care of me just fine.)
But what about the negative things? What about the fact that (MAJOR SPOILER HERE) he verbally abuses Ana when she accidentally gets pregnant after forgetting to get her birth control shot? He calls her stupid and berates her for “doing this on purpose” because it’s not what they planned. He then goes out and gets stupidly drunk with his ex-dom.
And what about the fact that Ana isn’t allowed to leave the house (or really go anywhere) without him? In book 3 (ANOTHER SPOILER), Ana wants to go for a drink with her best friend, Kate. Yes, there’s a crazy stalker on the loose. But Ana takes her security guards and goes out — which, if she didn’t, would have had very bad consequences. Christian, however, goes absolutely mental, completely losing his shit on her. Even though she defied his wishes, Ana ultimately kept herself safe, but Christian refuses to see that. All he can see is that she defied him.
Again, maybe it’s just me, but I would absolutely NOT want to have to live that way. Ana is constantly walking on eggshells, doing everything in her power to please Christian. And for what? So she can be with a man who is really good at pleasing her sexually and is nice to look at?
There’s also the fact that the two get married after only a few months of “dating” (if you can call it that; mostly it’s just sex). Ana even admits partway through the book 3 (after Christian’s outburst regarding her pregnancy) that maybe they jumped into things too fast. Uh, you think? They barely know anything about each other. Readers don’t see much communication at all between the two — in fact, no memorable actual conversations (where Christian isn’t controlling Ana) come to mind until the near-end of book 3, where he finally reveals what happened with his ex-dom.
Now that I’m done with the books, I can honestly say I’m relieved. I ended up basically skimming through the epilogue … it was cute enough, but there was no real substance there — just a big happy family. And more sex.
I tweeted last night that I feel like I’m one of the only women out there who wasn’t captivated by these books; I did not fall under the 50 Shades spell. I spent the entire two weeks of reading these books completely annoyed by them. It’s saddening to see so many of my friends absolutely loving these books… I wish more people could see how frightening they truly are.
And a side note: I have absolutely no issue with the “leather lifestyle,” or BDSM. I fully realize that there are people out there in very healthy dom/sub relationships that choose to live their lives that way.
But to me, the relationship between Ana and Christian is very, very unhealthy.
That’s really all I have to say about it all, for now. Once I start my Capstone in August, I’m sure I’ll come up with more … but for now, it’s on to something wonderful (The Great Gatsby)!